THOUSAND OAKS, Calif.-The "5th Day of Remembrance" of the Borderline Bar & Grill shooting focused on resilience.
That is something the families of the 12 innocent victims know all too well.
"Our resilience comes from the Lord," said Lorrie Dingman, "We don't have the strength to do this every day missing our kid without him."
It happened on "College Country Night" at the Borderline that never reopened.
The youngest victim Mark "Marky" Meza Jr. was born in Santa Barbara and grew up in Carpinteria.
Theresa Ramirez said her son Marky was just 12 days shy of 21.
He was the youngest victim killed by a former Newbury Park Marine who died by suicide.
A mental health crisis team had visited the gunman who still had access to guns.
When asked what Ramirez remembers most about her son she said his light.
"Just his light and his spirit and his how his goal was to make everyone happy and smile and he is still doing that we have video and photos and tons of memories," said Ramirez," There isn't a day that goes by that we don't have remembrance."
Many of the young people went to the Borderline to line dance and some of them danced at Cody Coffman's funeral.
Coffman's father said he knows something like this could happen again.
"Stay strong keep your head up it does happen all the time and every time we get a little bit stronger and a little bit of a community that we don't want," said Coffman," So keep your head up stay strong."
Sgt. Ron Helis was the first officer to arrive at the Borderline and was fatally struck by another officer's bullet.
"Sgt. Helus was a hero, he gave his life in sacrifice of others I was just speaking to his widow you see in her the strength and resilience," said District Attorney Erik Nazarenko.
The healing garden surrounds a pond full of ducks and a dozen turtles representing the victims.
Many of the victim's parents have set up scholarships and foundations in their memory.
"We have chosen to put our grief into doing something for others which is our challenge for others," said Dingman.
The Blake Dingman & Jake Dunham Holderwide Foundation is one of them.
It is named after the good friends who died and benefits people injured in off road accidents.
For more information visit https://www.holderwide.org
The Cody lee Hoffman Foundation funds umpire scholarships.
For information visit https://www,codylee.org.
They were grateful to see many of more than 240 Borderline survivors at the remembrance.
Help is still available through the California Victim Compensation Board for those who were at the Borderline Bar & Grill during the shooting.
Services include reimbursements for medical bills, mental health treatment, and income loss.
To learn more contact Supervising Victim Advocate Kelly Muklevicz at (805)826-5058.